Fry Everything (song)

Ecclesiastes 3 says there is a time and season for every purpose under Heaven- including a time to laugh. Hopefully, this silly ditty will help you meat up with some fun in this zoo of a blog. :-)

"Fry Everything" (parody of "Try Everything", as performed by Shakira in the Disney movie "Zootopia"; copyright by Nathan Ludwick 2/10/2020)
(Ecclesiastes 3, Acts 10, 1 Corinthians 10:25)

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh (×4)

I gassed up the fryer
It's just another night
Always gas up and just start again
The meat's lying down
My beef's on if cubed or ground
Marinade, ketchup's out, the season's next
Birds for next time
They're thawing now, all set up
No party's thrown and Thanksgiving is done

I won't give it up; no, I won't give in
Though I bleed Wesson
Morning- I'll start again
Through clogged arteries
I wanna fry everything
I wanna fry everything even though health could fail
I want Crisco soaking through my skin
'Til day reaches end
And then I'll start again
So I want heat
I wanna fry everything
I wanna fry 'til Mazola I exhale

(Chorus)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh- fry everything! (×3)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Look how fat I've become
I filled my heart with crud
Don't need "Lube Jobs 'R' Us"- Grease is on my breath
Don't grease myself up
At beach for sun to tan
Sometimes I'm so tan that I quote "Houseguest"

I go look up 1st. Corinthians
25- read in 10
And then I'll say "Amen!"
God said, "Kill and eat!"
I wanna fry everything!
In 10 Acts, fry Peter's whole buffet meal

I won't give it up- no, I won't go vegan
But I'll eat garden
Salad fried- start skillet!
Nothing fried I won't eat
I wanna fry everything
I wanna fry even goat milk, soup and kale

I'll keep on making country fried steaks
I'll keep on saying fried foods are safe
Don't do "missed steaks"

(Repeat Chorus)

Fry everything!

Yemana's First Class (Barney Miller's Roll) (song)

Note: This is an older archive entry that I just thought was funny. :-)


This one I just had the idea for one day and just had to do it because it was too funny not to. This is another one of my favorite classic ‘70s rock tunes that even if your mama don’t dance and your daddy don’t rock and roll to- you’ll probably enjoy it. And it was just too fitting that I was able to fit one of my favorite characters’ names in from one of my recently newly engrossed in ‘70s sitcom favorites. (I’d known about the show but never really watched it until watching the first few seasons on DVD from the library. :-)) Even if I have to watch the show in a crumbling old building with questionable plumbing and a diverse group of wacky but hilarious and dedicated cops- Barney Miller keeps it all under control somehow and helps make it bearable. :-)

“Yemana’s First Class (Barney Miller’s Roll)”
Copyright by Nathan Ludwick 7/31/2011
(parody of “Your Mama Don’t Dance” by Loggins & Messina)
(Proverbs 15:30 seems to be about the only applicable Bible reference here- lol.)

Yemana’s first class
And the sergeant’s no-go, Wojo
Yemana gambles
And uh, Harris just rocks the clothes
Then Dietrich comes around
And it’s time to lay Fish down
Where’s Chano?
He’s off the roll

Well, in New York state
There’s a lot to fill the plate for them
If they’re out on a stake
For muggers-(they’re) homely dates as women
You know there’s more confusion
You know whenever Luger (just) comes on in
I’ll say it again

And it’s all because
Yemana’s coffee’s bad
And Wojciehowicz just rocks the boat
Yemana’s work-challenged
And uh, Harris just writes novels
What Dietrich knows abounds
And it’s time to go (to) the john
For Fish is old
He’s not dead though

They pile into 12th. precinct
And type up their reports
They often do without things
‘Cause they know NY’s so poor
They’re just about, uh, losing
Patience- wanna scream!
There’s a lot on these guys
Haul in the suspects
“You got one call, Longhair”
“Marty- you’re coming with me”
“And no bargain pleas”

And it’s all on Barn
Yemana’s right hand
Man to Barney Miller, you know
Carl Levitt wants a chance
And finally gets it down the road
What Dietrich knows abounds
And he’s tied with Harris now
There’s ol’ Wojo
He rocks the boat
What do you know?
He got sarge- yo!
Where do they go?
To Barney’s roll!
………………………………………………….

Manic Sunday (song)

      Unfortunately, I am often known for being late to things. It's not like I'm trying to but it just seems to happen that way. Sometimes I feel like the prince of being late. I'd like to think I could be known for being punctual all the time but then I'm also the king of wishful thinking at times. ;-) And of course, it always seems like it can be a hassle some days on Sundays just to get me to the church on time. Imagine how much worse it can be for the preacher! This is just a little ditty to give a picture of the craziness of Sunday mornings for pastors (and as a pastor's kid myself, I know how this goes a bit)- and a reminder that every day is the day The Lord has made and we will rejoice and be glad in it. So bang a drum a little and praise The Lord!

"Manic Sunday"
(parody of "Manic Monday" by The Bangles and written by Prince)
(copyright by Nathan Ludwick 8/14/2018)
(Hebrews 6:10, Colossians 1 and 4:2-6, Psalms 118:24)

6 o'clock already- I was just in the middle of a dream
I was dissing Tarantino's new picture on the silver screen
And I can't be late or else I guess (the) pianist just keeps playing
These are the days when you wish you had a pastoral aide

(Chorus 1)
It was just another panicked Sunday (Ohh!)
And this is my Monday!
And that's what some say-
Why, I don't work but one day!
It was just another manic Sunday

Have to preach to early saints
Got to leave the church to dine
And if I had a chair, they're 'fraid
I still would be making point 9
'Cause it takes me so long just to figure out what I'm gonna share
Play that old refrain
Crank that "Just As I Am" 'til prayer

(Chorus 2)
It was just another Baptist Sunday
I wish we had liturgy
But that's not Fundie
'Cause we don't have it done that way
Not part of our systematic theology

Saturday night! Why'd my computer have to pick that night to shut down?
Doesn't it matter that I have to feed the flock, Jesus?
I'm going to drown!
He tells me in 6:10 Hebrews
C'mon- trust Me! God sees all you do!
Christ- He holds you fast (in Colossians 1)

(Chorus 3)
(When) it's just another frantic Sunday
I wish I was Sunday
Preach that fervently!
Get on Water Wagon- hey!
That's just another man's sermon, 'kay?
I preach- Jesus runs things!
Got that joy coming!
It's just an automatic Lord's Day!
.............................................................................

Scooby (song)

Just for fun because I love Scooby-Doo. :-) Hopefully, this will make you happy for real to enjoy some childhood nostalgia for a while.
Scooby Dooby Doo!!!!!!

"Scooby"
(parody of "Happy" by Pharrell Williams; copyright by Nathan Ludwick 7/19/2014)
Proverbs 15:13

(Verse 1)
Things might seem safe- Guess what?- it's about to change
Moonlight to steer- the van's about to break
There's a haunted old tomb there with a ghost from space
Mist in the air- "Like, Zoinks! I'm scared- let's leave right away!"
(Uh)

(Chorus 1)
Because I'm Shaggy
Come along- ghosts aren't real- I can prove it's all a ruse
Because Velma's brainy!
Come along- you too, Scoob- we'll trap 'em and find the truth
Because he's Freddy
Come along- if you go, Scooby Snacks will be here for you
Because she's Daphne
Come along, Mystery, Inc.- Like, Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?

(Verse 2)
Here's Scoob's nephew talking ghosts he'll splat, yeah
Says, "Give me all you got and don't hold it back, yeah"
Well, I should probably warn him he'll be reviled, yeah
No offense to you, (but) don't hate this child
Here's why...

(Chorus 2)
Because he's Scrappy
Post a blog if you feel like first movie stank like poop
That wasn't Scrappy!
Scrappy's long been scene-stealing 'cause Scrappy just gets 'em good!
Power of puppy!
Scrappy's on it- he'll go set traps and catch them some crooks
Because he's Scrappy!
Scrappy's got (almost) no fear- rides with Dusty and Yabba-Doo!

(Hey, go, uh)

(Bridge)
(Scooby's)
Been around
Since 19
69!
Sesame Street's time
same time now
Keep going
Bring joy now
I said (let me tell you now)
Scoob's around
Can't nothing
Scare him now
Except some bad guys,
ghostly clowns,
and goblins,
Monsters-yow!
He's scared

(Chorus 3)
Because he's Scooby
Come along- ghosts aren't real- I can prove it's all a ruse
Because Velma's brainy!
Come along- you too, Shag- we'll trap 'em and find the truth
Because he's Freddy
Come along- if you go, Scooby Snacks will be here for you
Because she's Daphne
Come along, Mystery, Inc.- Like, Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?
(x2)

(Hey, Go, Uh)

(Scooby) (Dooby) (Doo) [repeats]
Bad guys now- would've gotten
Away with it now- those meddling kids
Bad guys now- ain't nothing
But masks now, I said (let me tell you now)

(Chorus 4)
Because I'm Shaggy
Come along- ghosts aren't real- I can prove it- Jinkies! Clues!
Because Velma's brainy!
Come along- you too, Scoob- we'll trap 'em and the bait is you!
Takes lead- that's Freddy!
Come along- watch out though- 'cause Daphne's danger-prone too!
"Jeepers!" says Daphne
Come along- Mystery Machine- Like, Scooby-Doo, Where Are You!

(Chorus 5)
Chow down, Scoob and Shaggy!
Come along- ghosts aren't real- I can prove it's all a ruse
Because Velma's brainy!
Come along- you two guys- we'll trap 'em and find the truth!
Because he's Freddy!
Come along- if you go, Scooby Snacks will be here for you!
Because she's Daphne!
Come along- Mystery, Inc.- Like, Scooby-Doo, Where Are You!)

(Hey, C'mon)