A Cry of Praise to The Lord (poem)

      There is a misguided notion that people often seem to get about following Jesus. For some reason, we think that the rest of our life on earth will be not only much improved but also somehow carefree. Sometimes we think everything is supposed to go well for us. After all, Romans 8:28 says that God works everything together for our good, to the good of those who love Him and are called by Him. That verse does mean God can bring bad things together for our good but our definition of "good" is often quite different from God's. Many times we go through some very painful circumstances as followers of Christ in order to bring about our spiritual good whether we can see it right at the time or not- or whether we ever see a good purpose in this life. Jesus Himself told us that we would suffer persecution in this life for following Him. We can still trust that our Father is always good and always has a good plan and purpose in mind. He seeks to help us and never to harm us because He loves us. It can be tough to remember that sometimes when we are struggling with such horrible pain. Yet we know that God Himself endured horrible pain and suffering Himself on our behalf and because we have a God familiar with suffering and temptation, we know He can identify and help us through it when we go through it. It's hard to hold to faith at times when our world is shaken- but it's especially at those times when we must remember that faith in Jesus is all we have to hold on to at all. And if Jesus could still say, "Not My will but Thy will be done" in the midst of His trial, we can still say the same to God and offer praise with Job in the midst of our suffering. "The Lord gave and The Lord has taken away; may the Name of The Lord be praised." (Job 1:21)


A Cry of Praise to The Lord
(poem copyright by Nathan Ludwick 6/9/2017)
(Matthew 5, Psalms 6, 10 and 31, Proverbs 14:10 and 13, Proverbs 15:13 and 16, Proverbs 18:14, book of Ecclesiastes (especially verse 7:13), Psalms 139, Habakkuk 3:17-19, Micah 7:18-20, Proverbs 12:25 and 13:12 and 13:19, Proverbs 14:26 and 30, Proverbs 25:20, Proverbs 27:1 and 14, Proverbs 15:30, Isaiah 53, Luke 22:39-46, Psalms 46:10, Hebrews 11-12 and 13:1-16, book of Lamentations, Joel 1:13-14 and 2:1, Joel 2:12-16, John 14:27, 2 Corinthians 12:1-10, John 6:68, Jeremiah 9, Psalms 51 and 88, Psalms 42 and 103, Job 1-2, Job 13:15, Job 42, 2 Corinthians 7:8-13, Revelation 21-22)

Hallelu, Hallelu, Hallelu, Hallelujah! Praise ye The Lord!
It used to be so easy to cheerfully sing those words
With shouts of joy and songs of praise
I'd be at the lead taking the crew to church
But now the praise rings hollow coming from a broken heart
Somehow I keep a smile pasted on when my world's fallen apart
Do you really want to know how I'm doing? If we're real, here's what you'll find
A scream of fury and frustration that could shatter ear drums and souls
A cry of utter misery and sadness enough to rend garments and hearts
But neither of us wants to face the desperate longings of despair trying to hold to Hope
So instead I'll steady myself again and say our calming phrase, "I'm fine."
And that mantra lets us go through the paces in the places we don't want to let go
If I ever do open up, the inside pent up feelings might just explode
Through tears of grief and stammering tongue, this should bring relief to my soul
But my tears are my food and you've poured vinegar on my soda with your words
Miserable lot of comforters- why do your consolations sound so glib and trite?
While you revel in the happiness you are always so quick to share and tout?
Your platitudes and attitudes just leave me disillusioned and jealous of the image you project
Sometimes all I want and need is your listening open ear and your unopened mouth
And I'll try to tell you what's going on, even though I don't always know myself
Why are you downcast within me, O my soul? Where's your hope in God?
A Pollyanna theology is so quickly thrown when met with Job's lament
Yet though He slay me, I will still trust Him- He's the only Hope I've got
So I'll sing a song of praise, racked with pain- to The Lord familiar with pain
Where else could I go? You are the One with the Words of Life
And while I offer the praise ever due His Name, I gasp it out between tears
Awake! Weep all and wail- this is a time to mourn- better mourning than feasting
Ezekiel can't cry for his wife while Hosea's crying for his!
I can't blithely just lip sync songs of praise without telling God of the sadness that
roils inside me like a hurricane
Sometimes I'm awash in its fierceness in the quiet moments when I'm alone
Yet I'm not alone in the grief- we just all learn to bury it so deep beneath
Eden sank to grief and the whole world's been crying ever since
I'm on the run with Elijah from violent men who seek my life
Or I'm on the run with Jonah from The Lord who wants to use me to help save some other lives
I'll grasp the heel and then the side and wrestle with a broken hip until blessing Divine
I'm in the time of Jacob's trouble looking for Jacob's ladder
Clutching the cross like Simon of Cyrene wanting a life that's serene
But the narrow path of blood soaked sweat and tears cuts through my facades of protection
And drive me back to my Lord to weep at His feet and wash them with my hair
Firmly grip the horns of the altar like Adonijah and beg like Haman at Esther's legs
And though the crops have failed just like my heart almost did,
I've got to back it up in another direction- who can straighten what He has made crooked?
Better a broken Hallelujah than none and I think maybe that's the kind He likes best
So I'm trusting that the mourning may last for a night, but joy cometh in the morning
Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted
And even my lament shall be worship to the One whose mercies are new every day!
So I'll sing praise with Job- like the morning stars shouted for joy at Creation!
"The Lord gave and The Lord has taken away- blessed be the Name of The Lord!"
Paul's thorn in the flesh wounds deeply but Your grace is sufficient
Hold the hem of His robe like this daughter of Israel and know that His power's flowing
Even as they nailed You to the cross-
Father, Thy will be done! Mt. Moriah's ram and later Lamb remind me that God knows my pain
Let me mourn like Daniel and Ezra, not just over a ruined city, but ruined hearts
Sin is crouching at my door too- the source of so many souls crushed
The trumpet in Zion sounds- a call to fast and lament
May my eyes be red like Jeremiah's with lamentations for the beautiful cities wrecked
Who is the maker of my woe but the man in the mirror himself?
The old, haggard face that haunts me still when I let the cravings take control
Yet I know that man is dead because he was crucified with Thee on the tree
May that ghost be banished forever by The Holy Ghost-
The struggle is with me now, but I know that day will come
Even as the sadness may engulf me at times and I feel so utterly alone
I know Your Presence is here, Father, whether I feel it or not
And You've never abandoned me once on this journey You've wrought
Let the sorrow for suffering be stretched beyond to the Godly sadness for sin
Good grief! That's exactly what I need
It forces me to see how everything else always fails to satisfy
And it drives me ever closer to my loving Lord God Father who alone meets all my needs
Thank You for tears that tear open the shell I encase myself in
Thank You for salvation that lasts forever- starting here and through eternity
I know the Joy's coming and one day He will be here again to
forever wipe away all tears from my eyes
And until The Glory of Heaven descends from the skies
May His love flow through me to all so we all feel the warmth
And I'll cry tears of sadness for now trusting they'll be one day transformed to joy
And I'll sing His song in the land of my sojourn and forevermore
Hallelu, Hallelu, Hallelu, Hallelujah! Praise ye The Lord!