Biblical Sexual Purity Culture

 (Note: This is in response to a critique of what is referred to as "purity culture", posted on this blog.  

I can appreciate the points made and I do think the church needs to consider how best to Biblically address the issue of sexuality, especially with youth groups.)

Interesting blog post. I think the main problem there is that so much of what Is described as "purity culture" is not Biblical. If a church is teaching these things, then it needs to repent and correct its teaching.

To address them one by one:

1. Women are responsible for their sexual sin and men are responsible for their sexual sin.

It is worth noting that Romans 14 does warn about being a stumbling block for others and thus, it is worth considering that factor in the way we dress, along with everything else. 1 Peter 3 speaks to this point for women. Both men and women should be cognizant of how our dress- and everything else we say or do- can either turn someone towards Christ or repel them.

2. Neither women nor men should feel shame about their bodies. We both cover up appropriately according to the Spirit's leading out of love, both for our own bodies and for other people. It should not be a shame-based thing.

3. Both men and women have sexual desire (for the most part- I recognize that some identify as asexual and honestly have no libido). Both men and women are sinners. This is why both fail to control their sexual urges at times. Men are equally prone to be deceived as are women. Sexual desire is not the sin- lust is, along with sexual abuse, and sexual relations outside of the marriage of one man to one woman for life.

We all struggle with sin- and that's why we all need Christ.

4. Every single girl, boy, man and woman Is eternally valuable and loved by God because we are all made in His image. Women are more than just their sexuality, as are men. Our worth is found in Christ, not in our virginity. If a man or woman has fallen into sin with pre- or extra- marital sex, that value has not changed one iota. They are not damaged goods. They are sinners who are still eternally valuable. And Christ restores us when we come to Him in repentance. We must find our value and worth in Him. And because we love Him, we will obey His commands.

5. I'm not sure what this has to do with anything. I am pretty sure I can safely say, for the most part, men and women both enjoy sex equally. I am pretty sure most people find sex to be fun. I am also bewildered that women are evidently not familiar with their anatomy. It would seem to be a failing on the part of biology instruction in schools. Both men and women should have a basic understanding of human anatomy.

6. If men and women have sex before marriage, yes- many things can go wrong. Thankfully, God is still willing to forgive us when we come to Him in repentance. This sexual sin does not ruin one's entire life forever. God can still bring restoration and forgiveness. The lives of those who fall to this sin are still infinitely important and valuable.

7. There is no difference between sexual abuse and sex before marriage in the sense that both are sins. That aside, of course there's a difference between these acts. Consent should certainly be in place before any sex act and it should come in the form of a two word phrase that both man and woman repeat before man and God- "I do". (And yes, even within the context of marriage, the husband and wife should have each other's consent before engaging in coitus. Your spouse is not your sex toy.)

If a woman is raped, then the man is guilty of rape. The woman is not guilty of pre-marital sex here. The Bible speaks to this point in Deuteronomy 22.

I agree that these teachings can and have been used to marginalize and subjugate women. This is not right.

The church needs to teach Biblical teachings on sexual purity and encourage love and respect for all people. There is no male or female in Christ- we are all one in Him. (Galatians 3:26)

Transcending Transgendering

Note: I have previously addressed this topic and I wanted to talk on some other points with this issue here. As before, I always want to be very careful in discussing topics in general and particularly controversial ones. Thus, I'll reiterate what I said previously as a precursor. This piece is largely based in response to reading an excellent article from Christianity Today addressing this topic.

Yarhouse, Mark. “Understanding the Transgender Phenomenon.” ChristianityToday.com, Christianity Today, 8 June 2015, www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2015/july-august/understanding-transgender-gender-dysphoria.html. Accessed 24 Sept. 2017
......................................................................................................................................

     I wanted to offer my thoughts here on a topic that has become of great public scrutiny and debate in America in recent years. It is one that (pun intended) engenders strong emotions on either side of things. As always, I hope to be gracious in talking about sensitive matters and always remember that there are always sinners behind the sin and I am just as sinful and in need of grace as anyone else. I also want to be very clear about what I am discussing here and what I am not saying here. I want to talk about the subject of transgenderism and a Christian response to it. One of the clearest verses in The Bible about this issue is found in Deuteronomy 22:5, wherein The Lord forbids men from wearing women's clothing and women from wearing men's clothing. I think any Christian struggling with these sexual identity questions must consider this verse, along with Jesus' words in Matthew 19, wherein He reiterates Genesis 1:26-27, wherein God made people male and female. God has put His design in place and I don't think it is our place to tamper with it.
...........................................................................................................................................
       I think society assigns certain qualities and tasks suited to particular sexes and that may be part of the problem. If a boy is interested in learning how to sew or pursue dance as a career (for example), he may get told those are somehow "feminine" pursuits. If a girl is interested in playing football for her school or working as a barber or car mechanic, she might get told those are somehow "masculine" pursuits. (And girls generally get the label "tomboy". Interesting how there doesn't seem to be a "tomgirl" equivalent- boys just usually get the label of "gay" instead.)

      I personally think boys and girls and men and women should be free to engage in whatever pursuits they are interested in doing. As for the cross-dressing angle, that may come from a natural curiosity about the opposite sex. I have heard some transgender people refer to their feelings as being like in clothes that don't fit- some sort of discomfort with who they are. Of course, I am not sure how those feelings manifest themselves for individual transgender people- I suppose everyone has different experiences though, as the article indicates.
       How does this mesh with Colossians 3:1-4 and Galatians 2:20 and 2 Corinthians 5:17 for a Christian though? If my identity is in Christ and no one else and nothing else- then does anything else matter? If there's no Jew or Greek or slave or free or male or female in Christ- but rather we are all one in Him (Galatians 3:28)- then maybe that is the answer. We focus on our identity in Christ and not in anything else, despite what our feelings may tell us. I know there are numerous times my feelings would have me identifying more with a hellbound sinner than a Heavenbound redeemed child of God, but I don't trust my feelings because I know they're fickle and often lie. I put my faith and trust in the facts of God's Word and His love for me instead and I trust that when I obeyed Romans 10:9 and confessed Christ as Lord and Saviour and decided to follow Him, He is faithful to do what He said He would do.
           And I believe we are all called to endure as followers of Christ. (Philippians 3:14 speaks to this- Yes, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. That word "do" there is better translated as "endure"- especially when read in the context of the rest of the chapter- and the context of the letter itself, written from a Philippian prison.)
Hebrews 12:1-3- Let's fix our eyes on Jesus and set aside every sin that so easily entangles us and run the race with endurance. (See also 2 Timothy 2:10-12, 2 Corinthians 1:6, Hebrews 13:12-14, Revelation 14:12)
            We do this even if it means it feels that we have to deny our feelings and yes, even our selves in order to do it. That's exactly what Jesus called us to do- deny ourselves, take up our crosses and follow Him. (Luke 9:23) And don't forget that in addressing transgender people, we must always greet them with both lenses of integrity and compassion, as the article talked about. Because, as 1 Corinthians 13 tells us, Love endures all things. And Jesus said we must love one another. (John 13:34-35) 

       To clarify my stance on sexual ethics regarding homosexuality, which I mention because it often gets brought up alongside transgenderism even though the two are not necessarily related- yes, I do believe The Bible condemns all homosexual relationships, loving and committed or otherwise. (Genesis 1-3, [particularly Genesis 1:26-27 and Genesis 2:24], Leviticus 18:22, Leviticus 20:13, Romans 1, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-10, Matthew 5:17-20 and Matthew 5:27-32, Matthew 19, among others.)
One interesting thing to point out with this- "loving and committed" is a phrase often used to describe marriage and well it should be. People argue that same sex unions can be of the same descriptors. However, I don't know that whether a relationship is of a monogamous nature is the only determinant of whether it's right. People can also be loving and committed to worshiping and serving money, but that is the sin of idolatry and Jesus says you can't serve both money and God. (Matthew 6:24) The reason for this relationship being a sin is not about the level of love and commitment; rather, it's about the object of desire. We should have that kind of love for God alone. Indeed, the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil, as 1 Timothy 6:10 tells us.
Another point to consider is the meaning of the word "love" itself. The Bible defines God as love in 1 John 4:8. He is the One who sets the standard for what love really is- in fact, we only love because He first loved us. (1 John 4:19) God's nature is complementarian within the Triune Godhead. God The Father, God The Son Jesus Christ and God The Holy Spirit- Three in One. (John 17 and Genesis 1 and others still speak to this.) God made human beings in His image- male and female He created them. Males and females model that image of complementarianism and are made to follow in the pattern He set in place. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two shall become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24, which Jesus quoted in Matthew 19)
        Of course, 1 Corinthians 13, a passage often quoted at weddings, gives us insight into the nature of love as well. One key verse here tells us that love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with The Truth. (see 1 Corinthians 13:6) Jesus said He is The Way, The Truth and The Life- No man comes to The Father but by Him. (John 14:6) God is Love. (1 John 4:8) There is complete harmony within the Godhead, thus Love rejoices with The Truth. Jesus said if we love Him, we will obey Him. (John 14:15) Jesus upheld the model of human sexuality as one man and one woman united in holy matrimony for life. Any other sexual union outside of that model is sin. Any form of homosexual relationship is sin, as The Bible plainly declares in 1 Corinthians 6:9-11. (Note too that this whole chapter and the previous one deals with sexual immorality, so it's keeping in that context.)
           And if nature itself teaches us that it's a shame for men to have long hair (1 Corinthians 11:14), then I think nature can also teach us the order God has designed for sexuality, as procreation only works one way- between a man and a woman united in marriage.
(Which is in keeping with Romans 1, which also tells us that nature reveals the existence of God to us; the heavens declare His glory, as Psalms 19 says.)
         What do we say to those struggling with such things? If they are in Christ, they are a new creature- the old has gone and the new has come! (2 Corinthians 5:17) Our identity is found solely in Christ- He lives in us now. (Colossians 3:1-4, Galatians 2:20) Though God made us to be perfect and we sinned and went in search of many schemes (Ecclesiastes 7:29), Jesus came to pay for all sins through His death on the cross and Resurrection. When we put faith in Him, we have salvation from sin and hell and instead an eternity with Christ in Heaven! And Jesus came to give us life- and life abundant. (John 10:10) I believe He helps us live that life abundant in the here and now, though this life is surely beset with trials and troubles. That suffering comes with being human because of the curse of sin in the world, but it also comes with being a Christ follower, as it's something Jesus promised we would have when we follow Him. (Just see Matthew 5 for one such reference and John 15:18 and Matthew 10:22)
          Jesus speaks to the plight of eunuchs in Matthew 19 as well, and I think intersex people and all who struggle with gender dysphoria and homosexuality could fall in that category. There is a word there for them too and God loves them as He loves all people and has a good plan in mind for their lives as well. (Psalms 138:8, John 3:16, 2 Peter 3:8-9, 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 and 12:1-10, Philippians 4:1-14)
           But we also know that we can take heart because Jesus has overcome the world! (John 16:33) We have the victory in Him! And one day, we will have complete deliverance from these bodies that still stray into sin at times- one day we will be completely healed forever in our new bodies in Heaven! (see 1 Corinthians 15 and Revelation 21-22)
Until that time comes, we must continue to love as Jesus loves- love God first with all we've got and love our neighbours as ourselves and speak The Truth in Love as we preach The Gospel to all people! (Matthew 22:34-40, Ephesians 4:15, Matthew 28:18-20)

Physical and Spiritual Transformation

     I wanted to offer my thoughts here on a topic that has become of great public scrutiny and debate in America in recent years. It is one that (pun intended) engenders strong emotions on either side of things. As always, I hope to be gracious in talking about sensitive matters and always remember that there are always sinners behind the sin and I am just as sinful and in need of grace as anyone else. I also want to be very clear about what I am discussing here and what I am not saying here. I want to talk about the subject of transgenderism and a Christian response to it, particularly in regards to bathroom usage. One of the clearest verses in The Bible about this issue is found in Deuteronomy 22:5, wherein The Lord forbids men from wearing women's clothing and women from wearing men's clothing. I think any Christian struggling with these sexual identity questions must consider this verse, along with Jesus' words in Matthew 19, wherein He reiterates Genesis 1:26-27, wherein God made people male and female. God has put His design in place and I don't think it is our place to tamper with it.
Also, regarding bathroom usage, I generally feel that those who have a penis should use the men's room and those who have a vagina should use the women's room. However, this still poses a question for those who feel they should have either a penis or vagina. I tend to think that, while it would be preferable for them to have had the surgery performed before they entered the restroom that corresponds to their intended genitalia, they should probably use the restroom they identify with best, provided they clearly present themselves as that gender.
A similar solution would be in place for intersex people since most identify as one or the other gender.
It would probably also be helpful to have more family bathrooms established to eliminate this issue if possible.
And of course, no one should perform acts of rape, sexual abuse, assault and/or invasion of privacy, particularly as aided by the usage of cameras and surveillance devices in any bathroom.
This debate is a thorny issue to be sure, but one that I feel society will continue to address and one that I think Christians should be prepared to speak the truth to in love. God loves everyone and made everyone. I think that, as Romans 3:9-26 talks about, everyone has become corrupt with a sin nature because of the fall of man in the Garden of Eden (as Genesis 3 talks about.) This fall not only separated people from God spiritually (and brought about spiritual death just as God said it would) but that sin also corrupted the entire planet- thorns and thistles grew out of the earth to torment Adam in his work and pain in childbearing grew to torture Eve- both man and woman suffered pain because of sin.
It also caused an imbalance in relations between men and women, as Genesis 3:16 says that the woman's desire will be for her husband and he will rule over her. I believe this set in motion the battle of the sexes that we still see fought to this day. (Note the contrast that we have when we are restored from the corruption through Christ in Galatians 3:28. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for we are all one in Christ Jesus.)
I think this corruption is also why we have people born with deformities and diseases. I think it's why some people are born with tendencies to particular sins, as we are all born with tendencies to sin in general, due to our sin nature. For some though, it's heightened in particular areas, whether it's alcoholism (as evidenced by Fetal Alcohol Syndrome), stealing (as evidenced by kleptomania), lying (as evidenced by habitual liars), homosexuality (as evidenced by same sex attractions) or rebellion against God's design (as evidenced by transgender attractions).
The tendencies in themselves can be regarded as temptations; I do not believe they in themselves are sin. However, the reactions to them certainly can be sin. No matter how much a person may struggle with alcoholism, they always make the choice to pick up the bottle, imbibe and get drunk. The same follows for kleptomaniacs and habitual liars, etc. Yes, it does feel near impossible for some with these struggles to resist and with good reason- it is impossible to resist these temptations without the intervention and power of The Holy Spirit, who helps us say "No" to these temptations and choose to follow God instead. That is what the power of Jesus Christ can do. It doesn't mean He will necessarily take away the temptations (though He can do so if He chooses, perhaps in miraculous fashion), but He does promise to not give us more than we can bear and provide the way out so we can stand up under it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
I sometimes hear people make the argument that God made them in a particular way to be of a particular sexual orientation outside of the boundaries He has established (male and female sexual relationships held only within the bonds of holy matrimony and that only between one man and one woman for life- see Genesis 2:24 and Matthew 19). However, God is not a cruel and vindictive God to where He would make someone helpless to keep from sin and then turn around and condemn them for it. That is to say- I don't believe He made anyone to be a murderer and thus give them an excuse for murdering. Someone on death row may well argue that God created them as a murderer and thus they had to satisfy the need to take other peoples' lives, but they would be dead wrong (pun intended). God condemns and punishes that person rightfully for their sin; it is the same with any other sin. It is not that He made us to be sinners- it is that we chose to be sinners and we must face the consequence of that choice. I think too many people confuse the consequences of the freedom of choice that come with our free will that God gave us (see Genesis 1-2) with God's active will. God has both an active and permissive will. God creating the universe was born out of His active will. His permissive will is for us to suffer the consequences of our sin. He certainly didn't create Adam and Eve with the intention of having them choose to sin by taking of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil- He wanted them to do right and obey Him and enjoy eternal fellowship with Him. But He also wanted them to do that willingly and not because He forced them to do so. Thus, He gave human beings free will- and we've willfully chosen to free ourselves from God with it by choosing sin. Death- eternal separation- is the consequence, the wages of sin.
But thanks be to God! He loves us all so much that He didn't let that be the ending point. He demonstrates His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us! (Romans 5:8)
The power of the cross frees us from the penalty of sin! (see Romans 6:7-11) And because Jesus rose, we who put our faith and trust in Him for salvation shall rise with Him too. Our faith must be demonstrated by works though, as Jesus makes clear in Matthew 7 and James 2. Jesus Himself said that if we love Him, we will obey Him. The one who obeys Him (not perfectly, as we all still sin and mess up- but Jesus has grace that never ends! And His grace is still greater than all our sins- see 1 John 1:7)- he is the one who truly is Jesus' disciple. (Basically just read John 13-17. But specifically John 15:7-17 for sure.) And to be Jesus' disciple, we must take up our cross, deny ourselves and follow Him. (Luke 9:23) We are no longer identified by our sinful natures (Romans 6:14-23) but we are now identified by Christ in us (Colossians 3:1-3). And we must walk accordingly to our new nature. (Romans 8:1-11, Ephesians 5:8-9, Galatians 5:16-26)